Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
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He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
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