pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
I am full of burrito and curiosity
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize
