Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Randomize
