Goodnight sugar queer
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
People With No Siblings Will Never Understand These 23 Things
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
25 Seemingly Normal Things That Give Some People Massive Anxiety
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.