I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize
