Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
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