he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
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