I just barfed on his mom.
You told him you were too drunk to meet his parents. Totally his fault.
these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
i woke up today to a handjob from this really fat girl that keeps calling me michael phelps
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
23 Bisexuals Confess The Biggest Differences Between Dating People Of Each Sex
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
These 25 Ruthless Teachers Embarrassed Their Students
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.