i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
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I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
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got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat