He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize
