that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
You told the bartender at least five times that you were naming your son "Jagermeister" but you would use the bartender's name "Fernando" as his middle name. You were drunk.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
Randomize
