i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Randomize
