And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
Randomize
