We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
Randomize
