Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
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