Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Randomize