I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
I have a running excel spreadsheet detailing the number of shots in a night and subsequent ability to masturbate
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
