I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
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