it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Randomize
