It's a beautiful day for a hangover
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize