But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
you mean i was at the winter classic?
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
Randomize