it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
WHO CARES HE GIVES YOU TOE CURLING ORGASMS AND SAYS YOU HAVE KISSABLE SKIN AND RUNWAY MODEL HAIR....WHILE INTOXICATED WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. AND THEN HE SENDS YOU CUTE SELFIES OF THEM!!!!!!! WTF MORE DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE!!! DIE HAPPY ALREADY LADY!!!
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
