Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
Randomize
