i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
Randomize
