today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
Randomize