therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
Randomize