gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
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