Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Randomize
