so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
sex in a hospital.. check
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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