I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Randomize
