What did we do last night that was yellow?
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
