Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
Randomize
