I just pynch a tree in the face
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
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