no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
Randomize