Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Randomize
