It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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