I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
Randomize
