the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple