This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
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