how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
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