does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
Randomize