Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
