Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
Randomize
