I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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