I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
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