So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
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