there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
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