he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
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