My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
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