Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize