But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
