take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
I'm going to invent an ap that tests your stress levels before texting and will say something like "nope, go rub one out and try again in 10 min"
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize